We all know that online dating comes with ups and downs, and just because it’s online doesn’t mean you won’t encounter people and situations that aren’t exactly ideal. It’s all part of the process!
Here are five situations where it’s perfectly okay to say “no” to a date:
1. They said something over a message that doesn’t sit right.
Of course, with how rampant texting and emailing instead of calling is nowadays, tones can always be misread and misinterpreted. However, if someone you’ve been chatting with says something that doesn’t sit right with with you, listen to yourself. If they come on too strong, hint at inappropriate behavior too soon, or say something offensive, do not feel obligated to accept a date with them.
2. They waited until the last minute and you have other plans.
We’re quick to cast aside all other plans when there’s a chance of a date, but by doing so, we’ve helped create a world in which people think it’s okay to wait until the very last minute to ask someone out. Let’s help end this! Everyones time is valuable; if someone wants to see you, they should respect your time and plan ahead. If your week has already been booked and they asked to see you, offer up another time but don’t drop your plans for their last-minute style.
3. You’re not in the right mind frame.
Even if you’ve been talking to someone for several days or weeks, and are looking forward to meeting them, you have to make sure you’re in the right frame of mind to go on a date. We’re all human and have bad days, or things happen beyond our control. Be as honest as you feel comfortable with in your explanation and try to set a hard time for the raincheck!
4. You were on the fence and something else came up.
If you’ve been trying to decide whether or not you could like this person that asked you out, and in the meantime a better offer comes up that excites you more, it’s more than okay to say no. Not to say you need to be jumping up and down with excitement over every person who asks you out, but there’s a difference between clearing your schedule in hopes of seeing someone and going out with someone because their a last resort.
5. You’re just not feeling it.
It’s cliché, but it’s true. Your gut is usually right, so listen to it. If something about the person, the date, the approach, the ask, the plan, anything feels wrong or off to you, just say “No thanks!” There will be plenty more dates to come and until then, hold out.